So it is early in the morning. One can hear faintly the sounds of the crickets still at work and the early morning birds chirping. In the other room, the low chain-saw-like growl of snoring, farting, and drooling resonates like a large commercial freezer set to chill (or perhaps an industrial woodchipper), as my wife lays sound asleep in bed. OK - I admit that was gratuitus. She reads this blog once in awhile... and I couldn't resist :smile:
So... quiet as a mouse ...I shuffle, bumble, and tiptoe into the bathroom, eyes still three-quarters shut. After taking care of the first order of business, then comes the second order of business - the one I've been waiting for (fearing, dreading, hopefully expecting) ...as I climb onboard my scale and stand in judgement.
The very first time the scale dips into new virgin territory I plant the flag and claim it for my own. I am like Juan Ponce De Leon or Chistopher Columbus (or maybe even Don Quixote in all his glory - tilting at windmills).
"*This* ...is my new land", I proclaim triumphantly! "I will LIVE HERE!", I think.
But I know, like a ghost or like a vapor, it is here but a fleeting moment. Here, and then gone. I anxiously await the next cycle of up and down to see if once again I will hit this newfound land, ...the land I have discovered and claimed and named in my own honor.
Slowly I dipsy doodle up and down on the scale until one day I sail momentarily lower than where I had last planted the flag, and I plant a new one on my short visit to this brand spankin' new territory.
"I proclaim thee Littlersizedohbuht, land of tiny people!"
OK - I am getting carried away here. But it is interesting the way I weigh myself. I do not climb all over the scale in gyrations to find the sweet spot. I *have* weighed myself more than once though I can honestly say, ...um, to ahhh, make sure my scale is still accurate on subsequent reads. Yeah,... that's the reason. But no gyrations. I always knock off reweighing after at least the fifth or sixth try, I promise!
Anyhow, in reading the blogs of experienced low carb weight loss champions I have found it interesting on when someone claims a weight for themselves and how they do so.
Over at the Carbohydrate Addict blog (http://stumblingtobethlehem.blogspot.com/), Victoria actually sets several goals for the weight. I am almost reluctant to recount them for fear of getting it wrong. But she measures and counts the weight if:
1. she hits the weight on any day
2. hits it on a Sunday
3. hits it four days in a week
And I think I have read previously and remember where she counts weighing the weight consistently for a week or more.
That demonstrates a maturity of thought and effort that I can appreciate, but am growing into still. I still want to have a carnival everytime I can hit lower weight, even if it is mere milliseconds or the result of some large object in space altering gravity momentarily as it sails past Earth or something. I'LL TAKE IT!!! :smile:
So it begs the question... What level of the maturity model are you at in your weighing, measuring, and metrics recording?
The Seven Levels of Weight Loss & Weighing Maturity:
1.) What's Maturity? I'll even jump up and down on the scale if necessary, to get that needle swinging back and forth! Anything for lower numbers!
2.) I'll take it if I see it, even if I *think* I might have seen it! Scale gymnastics ARE acceptable.
3.) I definitely must actually *see* the weight on the scale, though I would take the word of a one-armed, rabid, senile, demented, blind-in-both-eyes con-man if he offered it.
4.) The numbers gotta be there for awhile. Maybe a day, ...or at least an hour or so. OK, I'll take five minutes...
5.) I gotta have some hang-time there before I claim these numbers as my own!
6.) I will live at this weight for a month or I will absolutely refuse to accept it
7.) Ten scientists and doctors must conduct multiple experiments with lasers and atomic microscope powered Ultra-magnetic resonance imaging computer-precision scales to calculate the collective weight of all my individual atoms and ensure that the margin of error is beyond any question or doubt. Published papers in a medical journal on the subject (after peer review), might be considered, ...Maybe.
How do you do it? Are you weighing like a cheap carnival showman, or weighing and calculating like Albert Einstein might calculate it? Do you have any techniques? Do you have any couth? Do weigh with style? Or do you weigh like you tell fishin stories to your buddies?
Do you have a guilty conscience for the way you point the fan up from the ground blowing up on you and you jump and cluck and flap your wings in hopes of a few less ounces....
Do you weigh using the "Crane style" or "Monkey Style"? Do you adjust your position on the scale like someone adjusting old style rabbit ear antennas to get some really fuzzy TV station to come in... Tell the truth! Do you know exactly where the SWEET SPOT on your scale is? Have you actually LOOKED FOR IT? Have you found it?? Have you worn the paint off on it?
Would your weighing stand the scrutiny of your peers? Fess up.... You know you want to tell all!
I will offer my personal absolution (for what it is worth) only to those who clear their burdened consciences in whole, and leave nothing out in comments to this post. You will potentially receive the forgiveness of your collective world body of low carb weight loss peers. The one millionth comment on this post may possibly receive an Apple i-Pod!
:smile:
